How To Win Your Ex Boyfriend And Girlfriends Back. Before you can begin your path of transformation and become the type of man who will draw your ex back into your life (as opposed to trying to drag her back into your life with begging and pleading), you must first ask yourself a simple question.
Instead of asking “How to get her back” ask yourself honestly.
Why do I want to get back with my ex girlfriend in the first place?
Over the past decade, I’ve coached countless men through devastating breakups and divorces and, in my experience, the driving force behind most men’s desire to get back with an ex is not the idyllic fairytale of chasing “true love” or a genuine appreciation for the value their ex brought into their life…
But one of the most dangerous thought paradigms known to man – scarcity.
They’re afraid to be alone. They believe that their ex was “The best I’ll ever have”. They’re terrified that they aren’t good enough to date another woman like her and so they unknowingly deploy symptoms of scarcity such as desperation, neediness and weakness.
All of which will repel, not get your ex back.
So ask yourself this key question.
If you had the opportunity to date three other women who were equally as attractive, interesting, and exciting as your ex…would you take it or stay with your former partner?
For most men, the answer is obvious when other women of equal or greater caliber enter the picture.
Taking this into account, I want you to consider why you really want her back, again.
Do you really want her back? Or do you simply miss having a steady partner, regular sex, and someone with whom you can share dinner.
Are you afraid of spending time by yourself and confronting the challenges in your life and your inadequacies as a man.
Did your breakup reveal how much you hate your own life and, now that she’s gone, you realize how miserable and boring your existence has become alone.
Was she the first and only “true love” you’ve ever had and you’re scared that you’ll never find a woman who will make you feel the way she did ever again.
As uncomfortable as it might be to hear, I personally believe that 90% of the time, trying to get back with an ex-girlfriend is a mistake, especially at first.
Devoting all of your time, energy, and attention to win back the affections of your ex is not going to suddenly change her mind. Just because you want her back right now doesn’t change what happened towards the end of the relationship.
Although I’m going to teach you how to get your ex back throughout the rest of this guide, it’s important that you understand the psychology of your breakup and heed this warning.
Lost love spell
Getting back with your ex is likely a mistake, with a caveat.
The only time it’s the right decision is when you “win her back” from a place of abundance. When you’ve completely healed from your breakup, created an active and thriving dating life, and consciously decided–after turning down other women of equal or greater caliber–that she is indeed the best fit for your life.
In most cases, once you taste the abundance that’s possible when you become a stronger and more grounded man capable of bringing quality women into his life, you will realize that what you really desired was not to get back with your ex…but to experience deep intimate relationships.
And if you’re willing to take action on this guide and implement the lessons I’m going to teach you, you will be in a place of romantic abundance…and then (and only then) you can decide for yourself whether or not you truly want to start dating your ex again.
Keeping Him This Time
Don’t make the same mistakes. Remember that reflection period after your break up? Well, it should come in handy now. When you’re with your boyfriend again, remind yourself of what went wrong and try to prevent it from happening. If the problem was that you fought too much, then remind yourself to calm down when you have the urge to pick a fight. If your problem was that you were mean to his friends, try to be nicer, this time — your man should be worth it.
The How To Win Your Ex Boyfriend And Girlfriends Back
If your ex is the one making the mistakes, gently remind him that whatever he’s doing caused the same problem last time.
Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Though you should avoid making the same mistakes, if you’re constantly obsessing over not making them, you won’t be able to enjoy the relationship. Just have fun and try not to think about it too much unless you’re having a conflict. If you’re so worried that you’ll lose him again every step you take, you won’t be able to live in the moment.
If you’re insecure about the relationship ending again, your ex will be able to tell, and that will make him feel more uncertain, too .
Start fresh. Don’t think of this as Part Two of your relationship saga think of it as two people starting completely over while being better equipped to deal with any challenges that come their way. Though you can’t completely forget the past, there’s no need to dwell on it or rehash it. Of course, if any fond memory of the past comes up, you should talk about it, but think of everything as starting anew.
You’re starting over, and this time, you’re just going about it with more foresight.
Don’t forget to be yourself. It’s important to work on yourself to improve your relationship as long as both people are doing the work. But you shouldn’t change yourself completely just to fit some image of what your ex wanted from you. You should only change if you want to change, not just for him. Remember that he liked you for a reason originally, so if you change too much, he may not be able to recognize the girl he fell for.